top of page

Hints to Deal with difficult people "Life long teachers"

Life is a web of relationships. It is natural to gravitate towards those relationships that bring the most happiness, growth, and fulfillment. Unfortunately, at some point or another we are all faced with the challenge of dealing with difficult people. Or as I call them "life long teachers"These interactions can frequently result in stress, tension and anxiety that negatively impact your mood and expose you to emotional toxicity.

When dealing with "life long teachers" the key thing to remember is that everyone is doing their best from their personal perspective. Try to avoid judging others behaviors. Despite what we might initially think, difficult people are not deliberately trying to be “difficult.” They are simply making choices they believe at the moment are best for them, despite the challenges those choices bring to those around them.

Here are 7 step of how to best deal with a negative person:

1. Practice the S.T.O.P. Model to Avoid Reactivity

Stop whatever you’re doing

Take 3 deep breaths

Observe how your body feels

Proceed with kindness and compassion

No matter how challenging the situation might be with the difficult person, taking a brief pause will allow you to focus clearly and prevent an emotional reaction during the heat of the moment.

2. See Through the Control Drama the Other Person Is Using

Control dramas are manipulative behaviors that people often fall into when their needs are not being met.There are four primary control dramas:

  • Being nice and manipulative

  • Being nasty and manipulative

  • Being aloof and withdrawn

  • Playing the victim or “poor-me” role